I haven't really said it in so many words. We haven't talked anything about R since about the year 2000 (I kid :D) since probably May, on his bday when I sent an email that said I would give him the time he needed.

But yes, kolja, that's my dilemma. Maybe this is a 180 moment when I should do the opposite of what I'm feeling I should do.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss