"He said that he will want to see the boys everyday, even when its not *his* day."
Uh no, he would need to ask for your permission before doing so. That is your boundary. It is his choice to move out, so it is your choice to have him ask for permission.
"He is planning on coming to the house after work to see them before he goes to the gym (on his nights, he would then go to his place instead of home after the gym)."
Again, it's based on your approval. He doesn't get to continue to steamroll all over you regardless of whether or not you have a problem with it.
"On school nights (when it's his night), he will probably stay in the house and 'pretend' I'm not here and I can sleep in the guest room."
How lovely. Nope same thing. He's being disrespectful to you. You will stay in the master bedroom and if he chooses to stay, then it's up to you to allow him to. It's not like he doesn't have someplace else to go.
"On the weekends that he's in charge- he will sleep with the boys at his place, but probably spend some days at our house 'since that's where all their stuff is' (his words)."
Again, that is pending your approval.
I will tell you exactly what's going to happen. He's going to list his "demands" and when you start to disagree, he's going to go ballistic. Oh he'll call you names, say you're unreasonable, say things like "see! that's why I can't live with you" etc.
But don't you believe any of that. Stand your ground. Think of him as a child throwing a tantrum who can't get the candy that he wants. Keep ignoring him and he'll have no one to blame but himself.
I would suggest that the times that he does stay over, make plans to go out. Dress your best, smell your best and say "thanks for watching the kids tonight" then leave. He will hate feeling like a babysitter, but that's his choice.
You want him to want you again. You're in a prime spot to do so.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
