There's been a lot of spending by my non working wife - the last 4-6 weeks I can understand with Christmas and her sisters wedding, but in the months before that it was fairly frivolous. I'm trying to decide if it warrants a confrontation or not.
If her spending is irritating you, kill 2 birds with stone. Push for the lawyers to establish the separation of finances that she wants. Then, you will have shored off and protected your portion of the assets. She can do as she pleases with her portion. I understand it hurts to see it being spent since it is community, but I agree with 25mlc, that your pattern of "correction/control" has the big potential to play into this. Let her spend her portion of assets as she chooses. Reality can intervene for you, and you will protect your own.
By pushing for the separation of finances, you also would be accepting/validating her wish to divorce you.
If its something to do with possible depression then confrontation might not be smart. If its manipulative ("I'll show him, I'll spend so much he HAS to divorce me!") or malicious ("not going to give me the settlement I want? Fine I'll just spend it") then I might have to confront her about it [/quote]
you will Not be able to distinguish between the two. And either way, you will come off as mega controlling under the guise of "corrective behavior" which is a pattern for you if I'm not mistaken, isn't it?
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Me-53 W-49 D22,D18,D15 T-Since-12/2001 Married-9/2004 She Moved Out-5/28/2010 Piecing start-04/2011 Now-together Thread http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2079304
