WHG: Down the rabbit hole I guess

[Harrier]

I'm going to chime in about the kids issue. You've mentioned this over and over and over again. How it will hurt them and you failed in your job to protect them.

First of all, your kids will look to you for guidance on how to react. You've already set this up as the worst thing in the world for them. Your reactions will make this harder for the kids, you are part of creating your own worst case scenario.
Don't misinterpret me, I'm not saying that divorce is okay for the kids and nearly every study says that divorce hurts the kids, but your reaction to it will serve a model for your kids. You make think they can't sense it, but they can.

It sounds like you use this to view yourself as somehow better than your W. I mean how could SHE do this it the Kids? You take the fall, but then don't really follow up.

Also, one job as a parent is to protect your kids, but another job is to prepare them to handle adversity. I don't know about you, but I don't send my kids out to play in a padded suit because I want to protect them. I want them to fall because I want to teach him how to get back up again. I'm doing a huge disservice to him if I protect them from everything. because I can't and what happens when I can't protect him. how is he helped.

There are things out of my control. I know in 6-10 years a little girl will come along and break my poor son's heart. I can't stop that. He will fail at a sport, get a bad grade, deal with the death of a grandparent or close relative. I can't stop that, I can't protect them from that pain. What I can do is teach him HOW TO GET UP.

My parents divorced when I was 7 or so. I know what it's like to be a kid who's parents split up.