My heart goes out to you. I can only imagine how scary this is for you: not knowing where you're going to live, or make money for yourself.

You know that you have the capability to do all these things, as long as you don't get in your own way. Don't try to solve every problem right now, just make a priority list and check them off as they get done.... if you try to solve new place/job/school at the same time- you will become overwhelmed quickly! (all of this is easy to say, but I do know how hard it is to actually implement.)

If she told you that she wants you to move out so you two can 'date', then that's a positive sign. I realize that she might not mean it, but she said it and if you interact with her under that premise- then maybe she'll start to come around. And if she doesn't- then she will have to get the 'huevos' to tell you the truth.

Please continue to post here and use this as a safe place to vent out all the anger/pain/frustrations you feel.... just don't let her hear any of that. She needs to see an independent, funny, beautiful woman (isn't that who she fell in love with in the first place??) I am the biggest hypocrite in this sense- my H fell in love with a feisty, driven, witty, sexy younger version of myself... fast forward to 9 years later, 2 kids, no job, and no hobbies, body image problems (which led to SSM).... wow, I seem like a real catch. We need to find those early versions of ourselves, hidden behind comfy clothes, insecurities and co-dependance.

I'll try if you will smile

M-31, H-31
T-9, M-7
S-6, s-20mth
sep 8/1/11
ILYNILWY 11/29/11
Creating separation papers.
Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12
H moves out 1.20.12