Then again if he is depressed its not that surprising. He probably considers himself some sort of martyr for you to find your happiness. As you have mentioned this is more about him trying to convince himself that he is being honorable by leaving.
What a cop out.
The honorable thing is for him to pass his classes and be a good partner and father.
IMHO if you get to the point where he is doing the "oh woe is me" act. It's ok to calmly and lovingly tell him that if he misses you so much, maybe he should end this terrible situation and come back. As long as you watch how you say it, and don't beg it shouldn't come off as needy.
The overall message should be:
The ships is ready to set sail, you are more than welcome to join me, but you better be sure that you want to, and you better do it before its too late.
Sometimes the WAS will hesitate to return because they feel the LBS won't take them back. It's important they understand this is not true, without coming off as desperate or needy.
