WHG: Down the rabbit hole I guess

[2thepoint]

WOW! Tough day! I don't really know what to tell you other than to share how my sitch evolved to the point of notifying the kids about the decision to split up and then maybe a suggestion or two.

Before we told the kids but after W and I had already talked about her unhappiness and desire to break our family apart, W moved to the guest bedroom. She was in that bedroom for probably 2 months before I finally moved out.

I know you have said that your W is free to stay in any room she desires but that you would not be moving to another room.

If I may, I think you should consider moving yourself to a room of your choosing. I say this because what your W needs right now is SPACE and as much as she can get or you can give her.

She seems to be feeling out of control and feels she must take certain steps to regain control of her life. If you were to relinquish your bedroom, you would be giving her that space she so desperately needs and that may in fact show her that you are willing to yield to her wishes in an important way.

So, what do you think would be the reaction of your W if she came home from work and found you sleeping in a different part of the house? Do you think she would see that as a gift from you?

I just think that now is the time to try something different, something to diffuse the volatile situation that you are currently in.