It’s the new year. As indicated in my previous posts, 12/31/11 marked the end of my apartment lease, which I shared with my wife. We are not divorced, nor are we legally separated. Nor has that been discussed. However, we are no longer living together - I have my place and she supposedly has accommodations in the spare bedroom of one of her female coworkers.
I do not know what will become of this separation. She has not been very communicative on what the future may hold. She’s the one that requested we go our separate ways, so she is the one who has the best idea of what may come. This is difficult on me, but I would have to imagine this cannot be easy for her either.
In one of our last deep discussions, she recommended I either rent month-to-month or get the shortest term lease. I do not know specifically why she requested this, other than she may have speculated this would be the time it would take for her to figure things out. Considering it was the last moment, the only available option in such a tight frame was a seven month lease.
The movers moved me on 12/30/11. She basically gave me most of the furniture, and some things she asked if I could store. She took only her mattress and one van load of boxes, mostly clothing but a few trinkets. Before going to her new place, she asked if she could stop by my place just to visit. She stayed for an hour. Then, as she left, she embraced me tightly, whispered into my ear “I’m going to miss you”, and gave me a kiss on the lips. She suggested we should get together next weekend for a bite to eat. She got into the van, rolled down the window, and said “I love you”. She drove away. One thing that I regret, even if it may not have made a difference, is that I didn’t think of trying to make one last ditch effort to persuade her not to leave.
In the couple of days that have since transpired, we texted a few small talk short messages. I am attempting to become independent, but I find that I miss her. I want to tell her how much I miss her, but know that I shouldn’t. Now is the time to GAL for myself. But that won’t replace her, nor do I want it to. I want to put on a happy face without giving her the impression that I’ve removed her entirely from my life. Are there any suggestions as how to keep connected with the spouse while separated?
