I can relate to alot of what ur feeling Luv. Our timeline and sitch are pretty similar. Ive been through the mediation part aswell, not fun. It is amazing though how this brings us so much closer to our kids and im thankfull for that. Im sure your W has noticed too and thats a positive. My W has even critisized me for all the love and attention ive been giving my kids.I walked away with a smile.