GAL--I was doing ok with this until I had surgery the 15th of December. So I have been down with that. I have few more weeks before I will be 100% back to my GAL.
I did text him this evening to find out what time he wanted me to drop our D off to him in the morning.
And a few other texts, then that was it.
My goal is continue to detach except if it concerns our D. I can do this. I did it before!
Once the doctor releases me, I am going to join a gym to get toned up.
Tax season is around the corner, so I will be very busy with that for several months. Also, school starts again tomorrow. I have that 3 nights a week. I can return to my job on January 9th.
25 knows her stuff. Read, and re-read her posts. I've learned so much from her posts to me and to others.
I'd definitely stop the texting unless it's D related. You can do it. Trust me, the first day or two there's no texts from you about the relationship or live in general, he'll notice. And wonder.
My sitch is far from over but it's looking up. And I can tell you without a doubt that everything 25 is telling you was crucial. I finally got to a point where I decided to GAL and go dark. Not only am I a better man because of it, but at the moment my WAW is pursuing ME.
Me: 43 W: 37 Together: 18 M: 15 D: 8 yrs old ILYBNILWY: March 2011 She Filed for D: August 2011 She moved out: Sept 1, 2011 Reconciled: May 2012 Divorce Case dropped: July 2012
I went dark before, I can do it again. I guess I fell off the wagon because of the holidays. Now that they are over with, I will get back to working on myself and not put energy into him.
OMG! Yesterday was very stressful for me. I text my H yesterday morning to find out if he was up because I had to drop our D off to him since it was his turn with her. I text at 8:30 am to see if he was up. 9:00am came and I had not heard from him. So I loaded her up in the car and headed to his place which is less than 10 min from place. Rang his doorbell and he finally answered. He was still asleep. He asked why I didnt call him. I told him that I text him and if he didnt hear my text then he probably would not have heard the phone ring either. He keeps his phone on vibrate.
He works in the medical field, so he was on call all day yesterday. So he asked if I could stay and help with our D since his phone was blowing up and I said sure but I had to drop my car off to get the oil changed. So I did that.
Well I noticed that he bought new sheets for the bed because his other ones fell apart. I made a comment that he purchased dark red sheets. I started to laugh and said you know every set of sheets you have purchased in the past has been the same color. I didn't see anything wrong with that comment. Well he responded by rolling his eyes and saying that I criticize every thing he does. No, I was just making a comment on the color and he said I am sorry, it's just me. I said ok and left it at that and moved on.
After that, my mood had changed but I tried not to show it but he did notice it. When he is on call, he is totally stressed out. Well our D was being a brat and he was totally stressed which the both of them was stressing me out. We decided to take our daughter out for a while and that made things worse because the hospital kept calling him.
He asked me a couple of times during the day what is wrong and I would look at him with a smile and say everything is fine. He said I have known you for the past 5 years so I know when something is on your mind so spill it. I said ok and we talked a little bit. But I wasn't totally honest with him.
It's hard for me to be around him and not being able to hug and kiss him. He seems okay with it even though there was a couple of times he walked up really close to me and he acted like he wanted a kiss but didn't go for it.
He told me that I could stay with him or we could back to my apt and he will help me get our D down for the night and he would leave. I told him I would rather go back to my place. We ate dinner, I gave D a bath while he worked and he laid down with her until she fell asleep. He came back downstairs and finished his work and left to go back to his place. When he left, he gave me a quick kiss on the lips.
How can he act so cold to me and then sometimes so warm?
Also, I can't stand when I am helping him out and he will say thanks for helping, your the best. I want to say, if I am the best then why did you walk out on me. But I know that is not very productive.
Tell me about... Yesterday when my w told me I was a very good husband I wanted to shake her and say then what the heck are we doing??? Yeesh!
Married 6 together 8 Me:38 W:31 second marriage for both SS12, SD10, S6 Bomb: 9/8/11 (day before our 5 yr ann) W moved out: 2/18/12 D final: 11/12/12 Share S 50/50. Spend as much time as I can with SS & SD
I'm sorry, but so much happened yesterday. When were at lunch with D, he said I received a weird text message from my 1st wife, he said maybe I shouldn't tell you because you might go psycho on me. I asked what is it. His 1st wife sent him a text on New Years Day saying something along these lines "Happy New Years and I love you". And he read the rest of the text that went back and forth. I just looked at him and say you are right that is weird and change the subject. And I did not go psycho on him. But why would he even mentioned this to me? He doesn't tell me about the texts he receives from his co-workers.
Then last night when we were watching TV and he heard a unusual female name he looked at me and said that reminds me the other night when I went out with my brother for drinks and he got up and this lady looked over at me and said hi and told me her name, but she was with her husband, which was playing pool. I said okay, why are you telling me this. Oh hearing that unusual name just reminded me and I didn't want you to think she was trying to pick me up. I said Okay then and continued to watch TV. Once again I did not react or go psycho.
I have been working on me over reacting and hopefully he can see this.
Also, yesterday he said with a straight face, that he was a very honest person. I could not look at him when he said this because I wanted to throw up. I wanted to ask him when did this happen, but I did not. I didn't say word. I did a lot of tongue biting yesterday.
This morning was stressful. D woke up in a bad and cranky mood. Had to take her to the doctors and the doctor was running 1 1/2 hrs behind. WONDERFUL!!!!
After her appointment, I dropped her off at daycare and came home and took a long needed nap. My H will pick her up since it's his night to be with her. Received a text from him around 4:00 today wanting me to pick her up for him and he will get her from me. I text back said that I couldn't because I had to get ready for class tonight. Then he said ok, but if I get out of class he wants me to let him know because he needs my help with her, because he needs to bring work home to complete. I said sure no problem. But if I get out early, I am coming home and going to bed myself. I know that probably sounds selfish, but for the past 2 1/2 wks I have done nothing but help him. Now it's time for him to learn on his own.
