Thanks 25 for all the time you spent on my thread. I was an idiot i realize that now. I do want to make it clear that I love my wife and i am committed to saving my marriage. Its hard here to post everything thats happened and whats been said.I know im not the best at expressing myself well, something im trying to work on.
we did go to a few marriage counseling sessions in the beginning and it seemed like the counselor was talking to her 85% of the time.told her you are making him responsible for your happiness and you cant do that. counselor asked me if i was willing to make changes and i said yes but she didnt really give me anything to change.i think we should of went to a different counselor.
Two months ago I pursued my wife for a couple weeks( a love letter, flowers at her new work, the pleading to give us a chance. she said too little too late, where were you 2 months ago? you are just jealous, you think of me as your possesion,Im on this path and im gonna continue.. maybe in a few months we can see. I told her what i was thinking before and that i was wrong.ive told her ive been reading and researching relationships and i know now many little things i should have done that could of made a huge difference for us.
well after a couple weeks of that she started treating me like i was losing my mind and acting like she was worried that i was becoming crazy. so googling for a strategy is where i came up with no contact or limited with the kids and all. then i found this site and im thinking i need to come up with a better strategy. i just received DR book and i plan on talking to a coach.
I really dont feel like a controlling person everyone tells me that im laid back guy. after reading 100 pages of DR it really rings alot of bells with the nagging and pulling away and becoming distant. but we always seemed to make up.
Im in the travel industry and ive actually been home more in the last year than ever.
I feel at the moment she still loves me i see it. i think that she feels she has done so much damage because of OM. its not that big of a town. all his friends have completely written him off. our circle of friends are hurt by there relationship and it forces them closer. i think she feels she owes him something for sacrificing his two closes friends for her.
she said the other day that she has noticed some changes in me. more time effort and attention with the kids. i listen to her better when she talks. going to the gym. she said why didnt you do this 6 months ago?
I need to talk to a coach. i want to make sure i have the right stategy and give everything i have. you guys are the best thanks for all the responses
