WAW told me she idoesn't want to be married.

[witz10]

25 I have not given her or steared my W into the DBing world. When I first saw the WAW online I sent it to her before I started reading it and joining the BB. So I learned that it was a dumb thing to do. Now I don't mention it at all to her.

The feelings I had towards my kids were also for me being stupid and not paying attention to my W. After I wrote that I and got it out my mood changed and we had a good night of leftover presents from chanukah they didn't get to open.
They have been a lot of fun the past few days. Its hard to see them and be asked by my D why am I here and not with mommy or she gets hurt and she says she wants mommy. But this is a standard effect for this situation.

Friends told me gossip is just that gossip and if the older people want to talk whatever. they have nothing better to do.

I am trying to not concentrate on OM and her. It is difficult, if it pops into my head I try the stop sign or try to find something else to think about.

I am waiting to hear back from some charities I am voluteering with in the coming weeks. I have plans with some friends next week a sort of reunion.

I might write certain things on here but always nknow that I am working on me. I come here to vent my thoughts. and thats all they are. Nothing will change with me and my children. I love them and would do anything for them.