WAW in Los Angeles

[wawinla]

Journal:

Happy holidays everyone. I've been away dealing with my mom's situation as well as needing some distance. As my D moves forward, I needed time away as my daily visits to the board triggered a variety of emotions that made GAL difficult. That being said, the support and advice I've received here has made the journey bearable. I will be eternally grateful for the wisdom I've garnered from here.

My mom's cancer surgery is in a few weeks. Since the news, I've spent as much time with her as possible. It's comforting to know that she is handling the situation bravely and admirably. I'm hopeful and praying for a good outcome.

I spent Christmas with my WAW and my family. My WAW wants to be supportive of my mom (my mom does appreciate the concern), but it has been awkward. The latest request from my WAW is that she wants to spend time with my family but alone. I'm leaving it up to my mom, but it seems selfish to me.

In terms of the D, my WAW has engaged an attorney. She's clearly upset/frustrated that the process isn't completed so now I have to deal with lawyers. She accused me of stalling, why she never get's her way (vs. how I always got my way in the relationship), throwing a temper tantrum when I got angry when she casts her accusations. She's still angry, hurt, and full of hostility toward me. The demonizing continues.

I miss my WAW and our R, but I deserve to be happy. I don't know if I've dropped the rope, but I do know that my focus is the future and becoming the best possible me.