You sound like an amazing person! You've survived a major health crisis, a long term infidelity and now you are taking care of your kids by yourself. I totally understand having thoughts about the ex you don't want. I still have to redirect my thoughts way more than I would like. But its gotten better, each day it has gotten better. As far as the ex's family, you are the mother of his children so there is still a connection. It won't be the same but everyone including you will eventually adjust.
