Punkin, I don't know if this helps, but I have been incredibly cross for the last couple of days. I did have a wonderful Christmas, and I am truly glad that my xh had lunch on 28th December with his three sons. But, he has never ever, even after 6 years apologised to them for the hurt and pain he caused them by walking out on them and telling them they were never wanted, and that he never loved me.
He simply cannot see they show up to have lunch because they loved him. I stay out of their relationship, except to encourage them gently where possible to see him rather than not bother.
But would it be so very hard to say that he is sorry he hurt them. It would mean so much to them. It would have taken very little pressure by me for them never to have seen their father again. Sometimes being teh bigger person really really s*x.
So I am struggling with anger at the fact that he is having a walk on this.
And yes, I got to see them all and we had a great time. I don't normally get so cross, and can't quite see why this bugs me. you would think I had gotten used to it by now. Zero expectations on all fronts is the only way.
Before anyone jumps in, I am not going to allow any of this to spoil my New Year. I am just acknowledging a bit of undealt with rage in this safe forum, and then continuing to move on.
