Glad you are figuring out what she needs needs from you- keep it up!! I can relate to the 'listening'... my H always said that I would somehow turn his venting session into an issue with me. I'm ashamed that I made his feelings unimportant (not that I never cared, I just didn't know how to really **listen**.) Just like your W, my H is responding well and he actually comes to me to vent/talk a lot more than he ever did!
I'd say you should keep up your efforts and even though she may never say it, I'm sure she notices. Who knows, enough of those 'good talks' and she may come around I just keep telling myself that this is a LONG journey.... I've heard it somewhere on this board, that it takes 1 month for every year that you've been together for the WAS to notice/acknowledge/accept changes in you. It's not an exact calculation, but it gives me a reminder that my H will not change in mind in only a month or two.
I think the breakdowns are healthy- it reminds you that you are human and that you're feelings for her are true. Glad you are able to 'prepare' yourself when she's around. Good job on GAL!!
M-31, H-31 T-9, M-7 S-6, s-20mth sep 8/1/11 ILYNILWY 11/29/11 Creating separation papers. Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12 H moves out 1.20.12
I just keep telling myself that this is a LONG journey.... I've heard it somewhere on this board, that it takes 1 month for every year that you've been together for the WAS to notice/acknowledge/accept changes in you. It's not an exact calculation, but it gives me a reminder that my H will not change in mind in only a month or two. 