All I can offer is, if she says she is willing to go to counseling and give the M a shot, are you prepared to NOT take that risk?

Only she knows if she is serious and committed to working on things and she will either tell you the truth, or she will lie, if asked.

And I can only add that if you choose to carry forward and go to counseling, you go in with no expectations... either way...

Oh, and perhaps try routrevaille (sp?) if she is willing.