Hey Miss H!! I was just thinking about you the other day and wondering how you are going. How old are your boys now?
I still read here a couple of times a week .... I think I'm fundamentally co-dependent and whilst I've worked hard on it for years, theres a little left over co-dependency for this board that I just can't bring myself to release!! haha
I've had no issues with my x for years and I'm great .... but he took our foster daughters out to dinner in Sydney last week and told them all this really personal stuff, some of which I don't even remember, about the period when we separated. the girls said he was very defensive and talked about how it was all my fault. He would never have left me, he claimed. He also told them that I left him for another man - which is complete rubbish.
The girls found it very awkward because for the past 7, count 'em SEVEN years, neither he nor I have ever discussed those sort of issues with the kids at all .... and it's SEVEN YEARS AGO!!!! WTF!!!!!
After I collected myself (and I don't believe it reflects on my level of complete detachment... but I do admit I was upset and embarrassed that he was talking about that sort of stuff, all this time later, and lets face it, no-one is at their best in the middle of a marriage break down) I figured, heck, the girls are 18 and 23 now, they can manage how they deal with information he gives them. What I really thought about though, was how awful for him that all that stuff is still so fresh in his head. What is he doing to himself?
It really does demonstrate that doing the work that we had to do, while intense and extreme and hellish at the time, sets you up to release all that pain and anger and not have to carry it around for years and years and years.
It's great to hear from you. I hope we both meet gorgeous, tall, wealthy, successful, emotionally healthy men this year ... I think it's out turn!!
Love V
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
