Before we would go in, we laughing and kissing, but when we came out, we would not talk to each other the rest of the night. I believe the MC destroyed us even more.
I think this is true in many cases, b/c in the session unpleasant issues are brought up and not worked out. The couple leaves worse than when they went in.
Shaky, I'm not totally knocking the concept of marriage counseling, but if you have a spouse that's thinking seriously about walking....I would not advise seeing one together. I think seeing a pro-marriage counselor separately would work better. And Shaky, if you've admitted it or not, you do have a wife that is thinking about walking away from you and the M. She probably hasn't used those words to you yet, but as soon as the holidays are past, you need to brace yourself.
Sorry to lay this on you right here on Christmas Eve. But the sooner you get the right information as what to do and not do....the better.
Right now, don't try to give her physical affection. Don't try to be romantic. Don't try to get holiday sex. You know what I'm talking about!
Act as upbeat and as fun as you possible can....(and you'll find out you're stronger than you thought). She'll relax more if you seem to be content and not hinting at having sex or time alone with her after everyone has gone and the kids are in bed. That's not what she wants and she'll stay as clear from you as she can if you even look at her with those thoughts in your head. So, are we clear about the sex part?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
You know what I'm talking about!