I said that I would prefer to work on our M, but if she wants a D, I won't stand in her way... Told her that she has been fair and makes sense... & as hard as it is- have her L draw up the D or S papers and i'll sign them.
What else could I do? Now I work on being a better ME & loving my Boys... I deserve to have a W that can love me back, maybe she will come back... Maybe I deserve better... Feeling pretty bad right now. So hard to fake the smiles ... We are having a party in January, I guess I just put on an act...I am happy to see my family- but knowing that it is being torn apart crushes my heart and soul.
I traded one Hell for another... At least in Afghanistan I knew how to survive. This new battlefield is so complicated.
Oh well.... Spending the day playing with the kids, then yoga or the gym at night. IC appts after Christmas. May meet a friend later... Surrounded by people but I am so incredibly lonely inside ... I want to hold my W and never let go... It is tough, it is wrong, but I'm tempted to find another woman to hold... If my W doesn't want me, should I be completely non-sexual. I have always been absolutely faithful to my W... But she is throwing our M away.
(F.K.A. Broken422)
US 40's M 17,T 19 2 BOYS 13,16 Divorced 4/2012 11/2011 W SAID SHE WANTS D
"When it is dark enough,you can see the stars"- Ralph Waldo Emerson
