as Yoda would say....the force is strong in you...

[ericmsant2]

So....in about 10 mins it will be 12/23/2011. A special day for me. It is my oldest son's birthday. Many of you know about the struggles him and I had. I am happy to say that our R keeps getting better and better. In 10 mins I will be the first person to give him a kiss and wish him happy birthday.

I also wrote him a letter that I wanted to share with everyone. Specifically I wanted to share this letter to a few of the men on these boards that helped me in my R with my son. Thank you guys and a special thanks to T who proof read it for me. Thanks girl...as always I owe you one (okay so it is a little more than one :))

Okay here is the letter.....


To Jr…my son,

I want you to know that I love you papi! I love you just the way that YOU are!

I am proud of you son. Proud of the man you are becoming and will become.

Some say that at 18 you become a man. So what does being a man mean?

First it is important to understand that there is a difference between a boy and a man. Being a man is NOT measured by height, the deepness of your voice or any other physical attribute.

A boys main concern is himself. It is all about having his needs met. A boy has a self-centered view of the world. A boy is a receiver; a man though is a giver. Being a man is about the way you think and the way you act.

To think like a man, you need to focus on others around you. A man is considerate. See things through the eyes of other people. Always considering how your actions will affect the others around you.

But it is not enough to simply think like a man….you must act like one too; especially during difficult times. For it is in difficult times that a mans "true" character shines!

Life will give you the opportunity to learn IF you take every opportunity to learn about yourself, especially in difficult times. Life's lessons will come at unpredictable times and places. Remember, anyone can be a teacher – even those that you least expect to be. I encourage you to always be on the lookout for life's lessons and its teachers.

I believe with everything in my heart, with ever fiber of my being that you will have a life of endless opportunities. You'll have your share of happiness and at times you'll be disappointed. You'll face difficult decisions at times while others will be filled with parties and laughter. You'll have victories as well as defeats. You'll make new friends and you will lose some friends. You'll have doubt and at times a sense of invulnerability.

The lessons life has in store for you are unique to you papi. Remember, that every problem, every challenge has a solution, has a way out.

Remember, you always have choices. Always. YOU papi and ONLY YOU Choose how you live. You choose what kind so man you will be. You choose IF you are happy in life. You chose how you deal with what life throws at you.

Papi, remember that "a man" is gentle yet tough. A man is sensitive yet strong. A man is courageous yet responsible. Responsible in how he lives his life and what he allows in his life.

Papi….I have no doubt that you will …….Be a man of good character an honest man a man that is truthful to everyone, especially to himself. As hard as it can be sometimes don't lie, steal, or cheat. And never papi intentionally hurt someone.

A man papi will make tough decisions. Never hide or run from doing what's right. Keep your promises, especially the ones to yourself. Be consistent in everything you do. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Be someone who can be counted on. Be your toughest critic but also learn to forgive yourself and learn from your mistakes.

Be confident. Stand up for what is right and just. Live a life that is fair and just. Never give in to peer pressure and trust me I know how hard that can be. Always listen to that voice in your head and do the wise thing.

As you get older and when and if you marry, remember that family is the most important thing. A man will protect your family but also allow them the room to make mistakes. Be a good example and role model for your children.

Work hard but remember to LIVE and enjoy life. Work to live papi…not live to work. Believe in yourself and although I may not have always said it…..I believe in YOU SON.

Dream big dreams….work towards your dreams. Son, you are always capable of doing more than you think you can - so challenge yourself. Challenge yourself to be the best MAN you can be. It is not always easy Papi…but the rewards….the rewards son are oh so good.

Learn from your mistakes and from the mistake made by those around you. Listen when someone talks…and I mean really listen. Always be open to learning. Learning new things, learning about yourself. Seek truth and honor Papi…seek them for they will help guide you on your path.

Be a good communicator. Share your feelings with those you love. And most importantly, be able to hear and listen to those you love.

ALWAYS Love yourself. Love, appreciate, respect and honor YOU, just the way you are. Never allow someone else to dictate how you feel about yourself. Be honest with yourself…even when being honest with yourself hurts!

Respect others and never be afraid to say "you're sorry" but if you say it….mean it. Continue to be the man that you have grown up to be….Do for others without looking for something in return.

Choose the friends that you allow in your life carefully. Look at their values. Do these friends bring out your best? Are they supportive? Avoid people who put you down – avoid them at all cost. Keep your word…because it is important.

Accept that everything in life is not always fair. Learn from your losses. Embrace them.

Always keep a sense of humor. It really is okay to laugh at yourself. Stay humble and appreciate what you do have in your life.

What you make of your life and the man that you become is up to you Little. Eveything is YOUR choice.

I am proud of you son. Proud of the man you are becoming and will become.

I love you papi.

Love
Dad