living in limbo

[BFloat]

i'm so sorry you're here. but by reading your story and many others.. it brings me a sense of peace about not being alone. i hope you find the same.

as for your emotional meltdown.. i think we've all had them. i really never thought i'd find myself in this position and in the beginning.. i begged.. cried.. tried to rationalize.. and in the end, i agreed with the separation because i felt i was slowly losing pieces of myself by continuing on that pattern.

my H says he feels done. on the one hand he says of course he has hope that we will be able to work things out because why would he still be here (on weekends with the kids and dinner with me on saturdays) but on the other hand.. he never talks about us and anything positive. when i mention that we will have to think about what will happen in january (when trial separation ends) because the mortgage needs to be renewed.. he doesn't say, of course we'll renew or anything like that. he just says.. we'll figure it out. what does that mean?

i completely get the living in limbo. i feel that way all the time. i love my kids. love love love them! for them, that's why i fight so hard to save this marriage. i just wish my alien husband could get that and feel the same!

hang in there!