well i see that here in the beggining it takes awhile for post to show up and you end up on page 3 or so. i guess ill just keep posting/journaling for my own good. ive been keeping my distance as much as i can. the W initiates contact usually text almost daily w/ the kids money or christmas as an initiator. i try to seem like im busy and keep it short but shes good at talkin and i guess wants to have friendly conversations even though i told her i wanted space.there was an interesting text about a week ago that shes reading a book someone gave her thats made her realize shes codependent and developed this as a child and it led to our disfunctional marriage but our loves was always real. that now shes vowed to be a new person and she feels like she can let me go without anger. it was kind of a circle to me at first it sounded good then not so good.every interaction seems hot and cold. yesterday after dropping my S off before school i tried to leave quckly and she followed me out talking initially about xmas. she has been saying i should spend the night xmas eve. shes even told my D that i was. now shes saying her parents r coming t town and may stay in the guest room instead of other familys home a half mile down the street.That i could sleep on the couch. i said ill just sleep at my place in a bed or you can sleep on the couch. but later on in the conv. she starts talking about the changes she sees in me(more time and attention with the kids, going to the gym when she wanted me t go with her in the past,listening to her,etc).she ask why am i doing this now why didnt i do this when we were together. i just said i think ther is alot of things we coulda shoulda have done in our M that would have prevented us from being in this sitch. dont know what t think about her question. shouldnt mind read i guess.her financial cloud is approaching fast and she has told me she is broke. she wont mention the boobs of course, its the result of everything else. she says she needs help with a budget and wants me to help her come up with it. i know others have offered to help her but she claims im the best and it would be an excuse for us to have a conversation. i dont know what to do. shes still seeing OG which i dont bring up.why does she keep stringing me along it causes me hope and pain. she ask if im ok i say im good. i ask her and she says she feels she is in a safe place in her heart.
