I asked my H for the reason for hurrying too and his were more tied to what if something happens to him. Sounded more like something a will should be for, and I said that. I don't think he's made any concrete steps in that direction either, but it helped reduce some of his urgency to D.

I also think my complete acceptance of his situation made a difference. It was like he was gearing up for a blow-up and all I did was say, I'm sorry you've been miserable. Thank you for telling me, it's no worse just because you told me, and it could even get better now that we can talk. That took the pressure off too.

Yeah, a forum for deployed WAS's is a good idea. There's a deployed LBS here too.

Adinva 51, S20, S18
M24 total
6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out
9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50
5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend
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Happiness is a warm puppy.