What do I do next? Part 3

[luvhurts49]

Unfortunately for me, my W left right away. By that I mean, I don't think that she was having a PA until after she moved out of the house. There wasn't any apparent warning, she just up and left.

I have gotten the same basic responses, I don't love you anymore, I don't love you that way, we've grown apart, we're more like friends than lovers, we should never have gotten married, it was all a mistake, i blame you for this or that, this thing X years ago is your fault, I can't forgive you for something that nobody remembers anymore, I can't trust you for something you did 18 years ago (not an A or anything like that), blah, blah, blah.

I know it's all BS, but it still hurts regardless. I'm being blamed for things that she said she forgave me for years ago, yet they are still being brought up. In her eyes, I'm not allowed to make mistakes--ever, but if she makes a mistake, you better not ever bring it up.

I just feel like I am at a disadvantage because she doesn't live in our home any longer. Not being able to see her or her being able to see me (and any resulting changes) puts me in a chasing position.

I don't want to give up, but I also don't want to be played with or dangled on the end of a string either. I just don't rightfully know what to do. All I know is how I feel.