Three gentlemen discuss a winter project of building a house from snow.
They determine a place and time and when they arrive, without further discussion, they go about building the house.
A house is built, but it's more of a snow shack because one was building a quincy, one was building an igloo, and one was building a snow block castle.
I suspect one of the most difficult things about piecing is finally sitting down and discussing the goals of both spouses and gelling those goals into a mutual effort.
I could agree that your W's effort is progress. I believe her comment to her about you not noticing her effort, and her actions and your response now, is indicative of progress for both parties.
Her continuing to put in effort, rather than getting into resistance because you weren't noticing, could be a baby step goal.
Your notice of her effort, when you may have previously not noticed is certainly progress.
What wasn't previously defined and stated were those goals. We can see goals and progress if we want to look for them. And again, these are certainly signs of progress.
As I mentioned in my first post, how do we know we've arrived, unless we know where we are going?
We can pull observations and call them progress, and they likely are.
Rather, we can set the goals and then there's no question about when we've arrived.
The more intermediate, smaller goals we can set and achieve can give a much better view of progress.
