I'm thinking my next step should be to set up a date with just her and I. The old me would just ask her opinion about where she wants to eat and go with it. Seems as though she wants me to plan the evening. I know she wants something to look forward to, something she can put on her calender.
Why didn't she just ask in the past? I suck at mind reading. Maybe she was and I wasn't listening? Seems that is another area I need to work on.
I need more reading material. So far I have read DB and 5 love languages and know her love language is words of affirmation and giving gifts in the past was a waste of my time, lol. Any good idea's for words of affirmation?
So how do I address items in counseling sessions? I know we are there to go over issue's but she seems to be the one holding the cards. It is easier for me to say as little as possible as I'm overall happy with the marriage but if she is going to bash me, I feel the need to speak up and this seems to create a lot of tension for both of us.
Seems as though she wants me to change but thinks she has been a perfect angel this whole time. Yeah right, I've been to 4 sessions and each time after the sessions I keep thinking is it really worth it. There are times I would rather just be alone and just have to be in charge of my own happiness.
For now I will just get my emotional love from the kids, try to be as patient as possible and try a few 180's.
Feels good to get my thoughts out.
M 42 W 41 S 10 D 7 M 15 Years T 20 Years Divorce busted
