What else could I have done?

[antlers]

Barb, my wife left nearly 3 years ago. There was a very nasty 8 month separation before she filed for divorce, then an even nastier divorce that lasted 13 months. We have been divorced for just over 1 year now. All of the legal stuff is over and done with. Initially she sought joint custody of the kids, then 3 months later she re-filed and sought sole custody. Horrible divorce. I got custody of my son and she got custody of my daughter. I hadn't talked to exMIL in over 2.5 years, then a couple of months ago, I asked for her forgiveness for my wrongdoings and she forgave me. So did exFIL. I was struggling to save my marriage and family, while she was screwing my sons basketball coach! One of many infidelities during our marriage. And her lies and deceit placed ALL of the blame on me. She convinced my kids, and even me, that ALL of the blame was mine. And I took ALL of the blame for a very long time. Her wrongdoings did not diminish mine. I shouldered mine and did something about it. It took me 3 years before I could truly forgive myself. So yes, forgiving her would be a very difficult thing. She "hates" me to this day...and has not shouldered one ounce of fault. As long as it's 'all me' that did wrong, it was none of her. And she refuses to forgive me at all. And I continued to 'hold on' until this past Halloween when I realized that I needed to be more focused, and put forth much more effort, at 'letting go'. So honestly, I've only been actively working at it for about 6 or 7 weeks.
I know I need to 'let go' and that's what I'm working on. But there were so many issues and hurts and feelings that were left unresolved...I suppose I'm trying to get some closure that I can live with.
I appreciate your input.