labug: I can relate to the 'partial stories' that get told to the other side His dad has always kept a luke-warm shoulder in my direction- so I'm sure that my H has been spinning thing in his favor for a while.
bklnmom: 'geezer'... that made me laugh! Ever since I met his dad 9 years ago, I had always suspected that he was too close to the woman next door, but my H made excuses and denied that there was anything wrong going on.... then when they announced that they 'had long denied their feelings for each other' (only 1 year after his divorce) I restrained myself from screaming: "I told you so!!" I would like to try to find a way to 'impress' him...mmmmm... what could I do? In regards to 'keep your enemies closer'... my plan of attack is through his brother. He will be coming to our house for Christmas, and he's never been my #1 fan (b/c he's fiercely protective of his brother and never allowed himself to warm up to me until a few years ago)... so I plan on impressing him while he's here... and then maybe he can talk to my H on their 13 hours drive to their parents [I'm *really* glad I don't have to make that trip with my boys, lol!]
harrier: sadly, my FIL has made it clear, that he doesn't really plan on having any interactions with me... though actions (or lack there of). Before we separated 6 months ago, FIL would call or text me at least once a week to check on me and the boys... as soon as my H moved out- dark, pitch black. He came up for the Thanksgiving holiday, and was 'plesent' but made no effort to talk to me directly (we used to have hour long talks about sports, politics, kids, everything).
My H is taking the boys to his mom's place and then to his dad's... His dad said "I would love for ya'll to come down after Christmas. I mean, {me} is invited too- but I think it would be awkward." My H tried to say that it was him who decided that I should go (to protect his dad) but he forgot that I heard the conversation from the other room and they were on speaker phone
Another interesting thing I have realized.... My H hasn't talked to him mom in 3 weeks (except to plan the trip). His mom calls me everyday! She has been my biggest supporter! Even though she was the one who left her marriage- she has helped me see what my H needs during this time (space, who would have guessed?!) and insights as to why he left, and how it relates to why she left. She's also shared some feelings about her divorce, that give me hope that I might be able to patch things up with H... such as: "after 2 months, there was a moment when I looked back, and I wanted {FIL} to fight for our M, but he didn't.'' I think my H is avoiding her because she'll probably try to make him think/question his decision.
M-31, H-31 T-9, M-7 S-6, s-20mth sep 8/1/11 ILYNILWY 11/29/11 Creating separation papers. Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12 H moves out 1.20.12
His dad has always kept a luke-warm shoulder in my direction- so I'm sure that my H has been spinning thing in his favor for a while.
