--Rick & JB: I too am very glad about the trip to the L. I can now breathe a sigh of relief. --Val: I think you're right that anger is definitely a part of the process, as well as jealousy and repulsion given the A. If I didn't feel these things every now and again, I might not have a working brain or heart. But paralysis is no good, either, and I'm glad to say that I'm not going back there again.
Last night, I spent about two hours talking to Kirby Girl. I told her that I'm not looking for anything serious right now, and she said that she's not, either. So I'm glad that I won't be breaking any hearts any time soon.
Today, after I woke up, I went jogging. I found out last night that I've been running incorrectly -- landing on my heel rather than the middle of my foot. That causes that "pounding" sound and really slows you down. I jogged for some time the "right" way -- ouch! My calves are going to feel that for the next couple of days.
When I went shopping, I tried on some jeans just to get a feel for what I'll need to buy very soon. I found that I've dropped 2-4 inches off of my waist depending on the type of pants (jeans are tighter than slacks for some reason). And I look good in better-fitting pants, too!
When I got home, I sent W this e-mail.
Hi there:
Just wanted to let you know that I stopped by the credit union and spoke to ___ about the confusion we talked about last weekend. Basically, I didn't void the paperwork by signing it; I will not need to be present when you meet with your notary to sign; and you will need to sign those documents even though they won't technically be entered after I refinance the car. Long story short, everything is fine. I would meet with a notary as soon as possible so you can just give me that paperwork when I stop by on Friday; might as well save yourself the stamp and envelope.
Also, I asked her about the VISA card. She said that you can refinance the card into your own name over the phone and transfer the balance over. You might as well go ahead and do that whenever possible. I still have my card, but I'm going to shred it tomorrow, so there's no need for my name to remain. I spoke with American Express, and it sounds like I might be able to assume total responsibility whenever I get the official copies of the separation paperwork, which will be soon.
If you have any questions whatsoever, ______ is the one to call as she is up-to-date on everything. In case you don't still have her number, it's _____ x_____ (I'm assuming that last part is her extension).
Have a safe trip, and see you on Friday,
WCF
I did speak with American Express and found that we will have to stay joint on the card unless I can produce the S paperwork. Fortunately, W is still responsible for the card, so if she tries to charge anything to it, I will stop making payments and they will come after her for payment, not me.
You may also note that my tone in the e-mail was very friendly. It just felt natural to write this way. I feel that acting sunny and well-wishing toward her must be very confusing. Given her typical nasty behavior, she probably expects me to be cold and rude in turn. It just has to knock her for a loop.
Here are my old threads:
