First post, words of wisdom needed

[kolja]

Hey sunshine-
I'm in something of a similar boat as a left behind husband. There's differences of course (I'm the sole breadwinner, currently receiving some outrageous proposals for spousal maintenance that make me think my wife hasn't really thought things through all the way, or at the very least hasn't informed herself about the decision). But I can definitely identify with having made the mistake of smothering my wife and pushing her away in trying to 'fix' things.

I won't say I've ENJOYED your thread so far, because that just sounds callous, but folks have posted some great stuff here. I've actually bookmarked it so I can come back and reread a lot of the great suggestions here.

I completely agree with what you've said about coming through this for the better no matter what happens with out relationships. Something I picked up from another resource, [edited by dbmod: reference not allowed], is thinking of this as an opportunity. It's an opportunity to grow and become a better, healthier person and maybe (hopefully) a better husband to my wife.

I hope you're able to find something to do over the holidays to enjoy yourself!