The new place felt like home when I decorated for Christmas and put the three special ornaments which represent each of my kids on the Christmas tree. Once they were hung, a sense of peace permeated through me.
I've been making cosmetic changes, putting in a lot of work and upgrades which have changed a grimy, desolate place into a cheery home. Sometimes I'm horrified to realize I'm going be the sole occupant when my daughter goes to college next year and other times am happy to have found such a good home. I'm resisting the urge to get a dog although I keep thinking it might be a good idea.. but what at long term commitment!
Things are good. It's so much easier to live my own life instead of being caught in the web of the past.
I remember thinking that during the throes of the emotional angst that I'd give anything for a 'boring' life. A life that was about the day to day happenings. I'm happy to be on an even keel.
One thing I've found is that I can joke about the past. And realize how deeply devastated I was, how emotionally wounded.. how much palpable pain I had. It's wonderful to feel so much better and know I've been doing the work to be healthy, to have healthy boundaries, to truly have my priorities in order!
Love and caring to you all. Hope and happiness, health and joy.. and gratitude for what life gives.
