Don't you think that you should do the work on yourself first so that you can go on and have a healthy R with someone? If you don't you're going to fall back into the same old patterns that helped destroy your M. No, I'm not saying you only are to blame, but until you can face your own issues head on and deal with them, you won't find what you're looking for, because no one would ever be able to fulfill your needs and expectations.
