I thought I had mentioned my promotion. I got my captain's bars in March (at least for pay purposes). Got pinned in June (battalion wanted to do it at the dining-in, I said no, turned into a big back a forth and got delayed). Started wearing them in April at annual training lol.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
The nine words that just might fix us all Such a powerful post that resonated so true with me after all the DBing and seeing what MWD posts on her facebook page. In so much of this blog post, I see him DBing the world.
"What if the only way to ever have our own cries be heard is to be the first to look at the person standing across from us and initially see only that person and nothing else?
What if the only way to ever be heard ourselves is to be the first person to shut up and be quiet so that every person’s desperate voice can finally be decoded?
What if the only way to be heard ourselves is to, at least for a brief moment, let go of this need we have to be better than others?
And instead of looking for all the other people in this world to tell us that we are good people and that we are loved, what if we must first be the ones to give that validation to those who surround us?
What if any time another person judged us, or talked down to us, or belittled us, we didn’t get offended or resistant or reactive, and instead we mentally replaced what was being said to us with the simple phrase, 'I am a good person. And I deserve to be loved.'"
Don't read the below part if you don't want the spoiler of what the nine words are.
"What if any time another person judged us, or talked down to us, or belittled us, we simply replied, “You are a good person. And I love you.”
Shhh…
Did you hear that? Did you hear their response?
Of course you didn’t.
There was no response.
The very retorts that we all have developed over a lifetime of trying to meet this need suddenly make no sense once our actual need has been met."
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
What if any time another person judged us, or talked down to us, or belittled us, we didn’t get offended or resistant or reactive, and instead we mentally replaced what was being said to us with the simple phrase, 'I am a good person. And I deserve to be loved.' The article mentioned that if we did that, we would be responding to what actually 'was' said instead of responding to what we think was said. That's a different and enlightening perspective!
What if any time another person judged us, or talked down to us, or belittled us, we simply replied, 'You are a good person. And I love you.'
I can see where that might be healthy and beneficial for us also, although I see the need for responding to harshness mentally with that response sometimes instead of actually saying it.
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.
*sigh* I never expected to be on here again for a relationship issue, guess it was only a matter of time. Roger is such a good guy, such a great guy. We share so many interests, generally get along fantastic, travel well together, etc. But a few things, work stress, financial stress, him going back on anti-depressants, have all contributed to a few problems with the love life. I'm pretty frustrated, he's pretty frustrated, we're both frustrated about the same things though ironically. I think the solution would have been that he would like for me to initiate more, but it's rather hard to desire someone who comes home every day grumpy and complains about work, money, the stress of buying a house, traffic, the commute, etc etc etc.
But I also wonder if it's too late for that. I am not sure he would be receptive at this point if I even tried. I don't think he believes things can change. I think he's bought into the whole ILYBNILWY thing. *sigh* I should probably get some sleep. Maybe I'll feel more brilliant in the morning. I do hate sleeping by myself though (he's at his house because he needed to do laundry and such, and I had to come here because the dog was in my yard).
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
Do you think it could be a down time? Maybe you need to come up with something different to do to shake things up. Maybe you are finding yourself in a routine too. Time to break that routine up!!
Sorry I am sleep deprived, I hope that made sense. Hang in there. Hugs, kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
