WHG: When last we heard from our action hero...

[workinghardguy]

I'll post more later but I had to put this somewhere before I sent it to her...

W emailed me today about a child custody website I emailed her weeks ago. We exchanged some emails about how we could probably set up something similar using Google and not have to pay the $200/year. That the site is really for parents who are at each other's throats and that we aren't that. Her comment was "Clearly we're not as bad as A LOT of families".

So in her last email she tossed in another good idea. Then included a sentence making it clear she intends to file in January (which I already knew). And at the end of her email she adds, "I'm just anxious to get this ball rollin..."

I wanted to respond, yes, so you and boy toy can hook up without me in the way. But I didn't. I simply acknowledged the idea she offered was a good one. That I understood she intended to file in January. I also replied that I didn't think we were bad at all. In hindsight.. I shouldn't have done that... I should've simply validated and moved on... instead I tried to counter her view. Have to be more cognizant of that...

And then I added:

I understand when you say you are anxious to be free of our marriage and on be your own. Please understand that, while I am accepting of your decision and your desires, I don't share the same level of eagerness. So I guess I am just saying that I understand you are looking forward to it, and I get that.

I do hope you find whatever it is you need through this. I know you said that much of this is about me and how I treated you as a spouse, and that some of this is about you and your own concerns and issues. I just want to say that I hope you find what you need to be the strong, independent woman you told me you want to be.

And then I deleted all of that section before I replied. I really didn't want to... I really wanted to say that... but I don't think it would've been helpful or useful. And i don't think she'd care, so why bother?