Well, today has been a rough day for whatever reason. Started off the day checking her FB page. You think I'd learn from that at some point. I've done better about not checking it, but it's been creeping back in (the urge to check it) over the week. Anyway, that made me angry at her as I tend to get a lot of the time lately. I get mad that she's off having fun with the OM and is really not wanting any sort of relationship with me. I get frustrated because I feel like I'm finally being the person she wanted me to be all these years and now she wants none of it. It's hard to DB when she doesn't even know you're doing it. I know I've scored some points at times, but then she just pulls right back. So I guess it just makes me angry.

I initiated again today on the advice of my spiritual advisor. I've got so many people giving me advice I don't know which direction to go sometimes. But they are all ok with contact if she is responding well. Even though my IC said back off for a while. She had a final exam today and has been stressing about it so I texted her good luck on it and I knew she'd do well. She said "thanks!" and then I told her I got our dog's stitches out yesterday and the vet said everything was perfect and she said "good! good :-)" Then I guess I overstepped a bit and said I hoped she had a fantastic day today and she never responded to that. So I've been down about that all day.

I've got an appointment for another DB coach session tomorrow afternoon so I'm really looking for some positive reinforcement. My DB coach is so good at finding little positives that I miss and I always feel better after that. Also, I'm volunteering at the salvation army tomorrow to distribute angel tree gifts to the families that signed up for them so I'm excited about that too. There are good things going on, but I just feel like I am making ZERO progress towards getting my ex back. One thing I have gotten good at, is to not do things I know will push her away. Any support or good vibes are welcome guys, I'm in need of them today. Thanks!