Regarding "dumb things" we do, and mistakes we make in these circumstances....every positive action you take outweighs by at least ten times each mistake you make. And believe me, positive actions in these situations are about YOU! Do things for YOU! Nothing you say to them will matter much at all...actions speak louder than anything, so STFU! Make better decisions...that means to drop that load that you have absolutely no control over, and start genuinely taking care of you and your needs. Talking doesn't mean sh!t anymore. You acted your way into this crap, and you have to act (actions) your way out of it. Even if the marriage doesn't survive, this is something you still must do to move forward. You gotta do it if things are ever gonnna work out with the marriage, and you gotta do it if they don't! So it's a win-win situation....DO IT.
This is so very true!! I have found that my H pretty much hears nothing that I say any longer, I have had to repeat myself (at his request) quite a few times. I keep thinking "i already told you this" It is very bizarre!
Yet when I do something thoughtful or a 180, he notices and it remains. Actions absolutely do speak louder, that goes for us and them.
