Did you confront these friends? I would probably do that as one may be falsely accused at this point.

Since you know your W is operating from a place of fear, try to train yourself to view her that way when she is being mean to you. You'll be surprised how much that perspective shift will help your attitude and response to what you are receiving. If you see her as a scared little girl acting out versus a vengeful woman your response will be very different and more effective.

Accuray

Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced
M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11
Start Reconcile: 8/15/11
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced)
In a New Relationship: 3/2015