DBing against OW...?????

[imthemom]

jornaling on 180s and GAL...

I think I 180ed and GALed right out of my marriage...back when we first seperated origanly because of the drinking I was doing this with out ever having read the book...I set boundries, (if you wont stop drinking I will no longer have our son in this enviorment)..When I moved to this town (about 10 min. away) i immediantly joined a gym, joined a softball team and made some really great new friends...started doing things on weekends like rafting trips and 10k runs...my 180s were that I stopped nagging him and just let him do what he was going to do.
after about 3 months he started comeing around and it worked!..if only I had read the book then i would have known what to do once I saw the changes...
so now what are my 180s to be?? and GALing? I already "got a life" so he doesnt notice any of that...and the 180s should technically be me going after him and letting him know how I feel (since that is what I NEVER did) but tried that and it was no effective at ALL!!..so from his point of view I have continued with the life i made when I left and that is fine with him...there has never one time since D day been a time where he has showed any interest or even noticed that I was going anywere or doing anything on the weekends he has S14....all friends say once I start dating he will notice that..but I wont date while Im married so thats not going to happen. And I dont think he will think twice about it.
He is done...he has a person in his life that he spends time with so there is no down time for him...I am home taking care of kids and all that that intails...i dont have the luxury of getting up and running out on a whim. My son was sick this weekend, i took care of him...H didnt call to check on him once. life is easy for him, there are no responsabilities other then getting up to go to work in the morning and even then, he doesnt have to rush home after to make sure kids are fed and homework is done ....he can sit and watch football to his hearts desire without anyone asking for his help or input....what man is going to give that up and go back to a S14 who is struggling in school and defiant at this point and all the work it would take to fix this situation? He is on easy street and we are hard core work on his part....hmmmmmmm....easy street? .........hard core work????....................yeah, pretty obviouse.

just thinking out loud.......i know, prob should stop doing that...