Fear that she may not turn around and look at you again.
Finding the core of that fear will release you from it. Finding the core of that fear will allow you to move past it to allow you to detach.
The worst has already happened to you, and you have already been exposed to it.
And yet you are still here.
Why do you think you fear the future ????
Mach1 - thnk you so much for time and wisdom you have imparted. Yes, I understand that much of the pain is self induced, i.e stalking her FB, tracking the phone logs for calls to the OM. Journaling it here is actually me finally seeing it, acknowledging it for what it is and growing beyond it.
Your point about your W not doing this TO you but for her, and ultimately for you too is noted by me. I'm just waking up to that now.
You ask about my fear for the future? I still do not want a life without my W (although I only want a better M if we can do that) and hope for that, but really my fear is diminishing from an all encompassing level. I am really working on improving myself based on the things that got my W and I to the bomb level.
_______________________________________________________ Me - 53, W - 45, married - 24 yrs bomb - March 2011 still living same house but separately 3 sons - 24,21,13
