ITM, don't go there. Honestly, it's too easy to look at one instance and say "if only". I know it's hard. I have ONE instance myself, that "if only", my H and I probably wouldn't be here too. BUT, honestly,... if I look at it, it doesn't/wouldn't change the course of the total history, only parts of it... maybe.

You are still blaming yourself for something H is doing. This has NOTHING to do with you. You really, really, really need to drill that into your head. His alien brain is not something you can control, nor could you pre-stop it by anything you've done or not done. His journey is just that. His.

Do we both in a relationship do things that contribute to a break down? Yes. Diff is: You're willing to do what a healthy brain should do,... he isn't. Not yet.

Work on you, and don't beat yourself up.

*hugs*
Abbey

T:22, M:20
H:55 Me:45
H-OW PA: N/07
OW Jan08
Bomb:Feb/08
S: Apr/08
Back together Ap1/09-Sept/11
Oct, 2011, uncertain future/H is a mess.
Dec/11 - Doin'friend mode. Some days are better than others.