but I figured that my W is spoiling our kids, I might as well too.
Maybe that is all she is capable of giving ?
That is not unusual for the wayward spouse to become the "Disney" parent.
Is that what you want them to remember about you ?
I would rather be remembered years from now , instead of only for a week or so.....
What new traditions can you do together that are new ?
One thing that you have always wanted to do ?
Originally Posted By: luvhurts49
Now she wants everything but the house and is sayin she deserves to be the custodian because I'm on AD's and seeing a counselor. Guess what, I wouldn't be doin' either if it wasn't for her.
Don't worry too much about what she says right now. She is using her anger to get her way.
Just like a child that throws them self down in the floor when things go badly for them.
I read a while back that you had 50/50 right now with your children? Try and keep a calender, and journal of your daily events. Most courts won't recognize things unless they are documented. If you haven't kept one, then get one and write down to the best of your knowledge , all of the days you were with your children during that time.
Most courts try to disrupt the lives of children very little, and most will try and keep status-quo in regards to what has happened in the past.
Also, if you have not kept a journal , look back through your threads to remind yourself of things that happened , and interactions where she presented herself poorly, especially in front of the children. I have heard of people printing their threads to use as well. Although I'm not sure how legal that would be.
Originally Posted By: luvhurts49
So anyway, now I've got that crap looming over my head, bills coming out by backside, and my W has gone from mean to vindictive. How in the hell am I supposed to even keep a smile on my face during the holidays when this crap is going on?
You do it because it is what YOU decide to do. No matter how much it hurts that first year, the kids deserve better.
Also, don't underestimate the pain that your spouse will feel this holiday season. Just because you probably won't see it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
People can only give outwardly, what they feel internally. I have always used the analogy of the Space Shuttle.
Those huge booster tanks that are strapped to the side, contain fuel for take off. Once the Shuttle is cruising, the tanks are discarded.
It takes more fuel to launch , than it does to cruise.
All of this anger is HER fuel to push away from you.
It is her fuel to propel herself away from everything that she feels is keeping her unhappy.
