@ Rick. I don't really worry about if people will ever love me or find my attractive - it really is more of the opposite.. that I'm afraid I won't find anyone else as attractive as her.
I did take your advice. I watched my first Christmas movie last night... and listened to some Christmas music. I'll skip the tree. I'm working 16 hr days so I won't get to enjoy it.
@ West. You're right in alot of ways. I think she purposefully keeps me at a distance.
In some ways.. I think D will relieve some pressure. Our conversation tones are very different when we talk about D vs. life. Then again... after the D.... there will be no reason for me to talk to her.
I can't wait to go home for the holidays. I definitely need a break from my sitch and LA. 3 wks should be good.
M(f): 40 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
