Well, this morning I was listening to the radio 99.3 Lite Rock and they had Suzanne the Psyhic. You can call in and ask one question. So, I said what the heck. I called in asked her about my marriage and told her that I have been separated for 5 months. She told me she sees us working it out but I had to be the one to initate it. And told me to be patient. That was my fun for this morning.
????? Hopeful, I'm not sure anyone is going to be able to figure that out. Does he mean you broke him or that he is disconnected from you? But in either case, I would just see it as more of the same WAS script. It's words to prove how apart you are and make you understand he doesn't want a connection.
Does he mean it? Well, maybe in that moment he does. Maybe in his current state he does. But can it change? Sure.
And if the message is that your hurt him and broke him on the inside, well, he is just trying to get you to own his pain. Happiness is a choice we make... it's about choosing to react to life's events in a certain manner. If he is choosing to react in a way that causes him pain, then that is his choice.
And to be consistent... when we choose to react to our WAS's departures and behaviors in a way that causes us pain we also are making a choice. Most days, at least lately, I try to look at the day as a blessing and another great day. There are days where I choose to look at it as another day where bad stuff is happening, but that's a choice I make and then I need to realize that I have responsibility for how I feel.
Married 6 together 8 Me:38 W:31 second marriage for both SS12, SD10, S6 Bomb: 9/8/11 (day before our 5 yr ann) W moved out: 2/18/12 D final: 11/12/12 Share S 50/50. Spend as much time as I can with SS & SD
Okay, I am confused here. All the advice that I have heard from here to go dark. Which I am. But I was reading an article on relationships that this guy wrote and if you have any questions, feel free to contact him. Well his advice to me was to let him know that I am still interested in him and show him.
Depends on what the interactions with your H have been like. If he told you that he was done and never wanted to see you, do you think telling him you're still interested is going to help? No.
Actually don't ever tell him you're interested. It puts him in a position of power. People usually want what they can't have. He sees you as a killer prize, he's going to start drawing towards you.
"I have a question. The few times my H and I have talked, he has told me that he feels broken on the inside from me. What does he mean by that?"
It means he feels empty of all emotion. He knows that the right thing to do would be to stay and work on the M. But he just can't get himself to do it. Think of it as if he was stuck in a hole. All he can see are the walls around him because he's not looking up. He's choosing to stay in the hole even though happiness is right in front of him. He's going to stay in that hole until he starts looking up. Which is where you are.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
<quote>It means he feels empty of all emotion. He knows that the right thing to do would be to stay and work on the M. But he just can't get himself to do it. Think of it as if he was stuck in a hole. All he can see are the walls around him because he's not looking up. He's choosing to stay in the hole even though happiness is right in front of him. He's going to stay in that hole until he starts looking up. Which is where you are.</quote>
That's good stuff right there Mr. Bond... very, very good stuff.
Married 6 together 8 Me:38 W:31 second marriage for both SS12, SD10, S6 Bomb: 9/8/11 (day before our 5 yr ann) W moved out: 2/18/12 D final: 11/12/12 Share S 50/50. Spend as much time as I can with SS & SD
A couple of weeks ago, my H asked me when I was moving into my own place. I am staying with family right now. I told him after Dec. 9th and asked if he wanted to help me. He said sure. Well, last night he sent me a text asking if I was still moving. I replied back and said yes. His reply back was, "just thought it'd be nice if u clued me in on the move." I told him the reason why I did not mention this to him was because he had our D this weekend. I did not like his tone in the text messages but I kept sucking it up. But I felt he was trying to start something with me, but instead he accused me of trying to start something with him. He did make me laugh in one of his text messages. He text me this message: I have nothing to hide from u. If I'm doing something u ask me about, I will tell u the truth." I wanted to reply back, "Oh, when did that start?" But, I did reply back with "good night H."
So when comes over this weekend to help me move, I have make sure I look hot for him.
. My w has said the same thing... Even though when she first said it, long ago, I knew she was having Facebook convos with this guy and then deleting all trace of the convo, even though the convos were innocuous. Though in her defense I never did ask about them...
Married 6 together 8 Me:38 W:31 second marriage for both SS12, SD10, S6 Bomb: 9/8/11 (day before our 5 yr ann) W moved out: 2/18/12 D final: 11/12/12 Share S 50/50. Spend as much time as I can with SS & SD
. My w has said the same thing... Even though when she first said it, long ago, I knew she was having Facebook convos with this guy and then deleting all trace of the convo, even though the convos were innocuous. Though in her defense I never did ask about them...