You did very well with galing this weekend. I would continue to do what you need to do for the holidays and if he inquires as to what to do about Santa, then I would discuss it w/him. I wouldn't go out of my way for him...he's a big boy and knows where you are and what you are doing to get ready for the holidays.
You will find that he will be "ill" quite a bit. It's the depression and the stressors going on w/him. Some of it may be real and some may not be. As for him saying things to you, it's all part of the course. He's returned to the teenager stage, which means moody and acting out. Just leave him be. When he discovers that you aren't reacting to his behavior, he just might talk to you.
BTW, many of them will talk about leaving and hang around until you are at wit's end and you open the door and shove them out. They tend to think out loud and unfortunately you hear a lot of what is on their minds. He may attempt to aggravate you to the point of pushing your buttons so that you'll tell him to leave. I would bite my tongue as long as I could and not say anything to him about leaving. He wants you to be the bad guy and shove him out.
One more thing....he sees you as an authority figure, for example a "mom". Don't be his mother...allow him to grow up and be the person he should grown to be many years ago.
You have a good handle on your situation...
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
