Here's an update: W spent the night at a family member's house last night. Came home in a good mood and wanted the family to go eat and do some shopping. Went and had a good time. (She was fully engaged unlike last week.) I have a work opportunity this week that W has been pushing for for years. As part of GAL I set up the opportunity and have been prepping for the meeting at a level that is much higher than in the past. W says she has noticed. (W said the previous night before leaving that I looked happy and seemed to be regaining the confidence I had when we first met.) W asked me a lot of questions about the meeting during lunch. W also says she noticed I look skinny. (Weight has never been an issue so I am not sure if she was concerned; I said thanks.) I was feeling good about things--even thinking about asking her about the home renovation and sleeping in the same bed (did neither); then wife mentions a book about how to raise kids following a D that her C gave her; W says she thought the book was good and wanted to share some ideas with me. (W also thanked me for handling the kids so she could take a night off which she said she needed given our situation.) I was disappointed (said nothing) because I felt as if W had been noticing my efforts and that the impact of her noticing would be that she would be drawn back to me/open to considering giving our M another try.
She has not mentioned D since telling me she wanted it a week ago. (In that time, the work opportunity arose and she was happy about it, so maybe she is waiting to see how it would play out--for any number of reasons.) Our phone conversations about the kids have tended to be a little longer too; I may be overinterpreting that as a positive sign.
I started reading DR. Chapter 2/Beginner's Mind/Stages of M is my W and me. I want to share this information with her somehow but I am not sure she is ready or even how it could be done. Being patient is very tough.
I welcome any feedback any of the posters here have to offer. Thanks.
