IB your comment above makes me think of something, another reaction I had last night. The woman who held the party is a colleague in her 70's (I think) whose husband died of a terminal illness at least 10 years ago. She has never remarried and I don't know that she ever will. She has had the occasional date, and she and I once had a very intimate conversation where she said she thought she'd never have sex again when her husband died, but she has, she just doesn't know that she really wants to be with anyone else again long-term. Anyway, she admits this can all be very lonely and isolating, and the one thing she really benefits from are her adult daughter in her 50s and her granddaughter in her 20's. She can "see" her husband in them, and they are close to her.
I thought last night that as tough as it is for those who have kids to go through these divorces and partners' MLCs, that when the dust settles, you know, they have their kids. This must really be a comfort.
It is a comfort that I will never know, because I and XH chose to never have kids. So there is no one who "reminds" me of him in my life. It made me a little sad to have this realization.
M45 Bomb 6/09; EA 6/10; Divorced 1/11 Proud single mom of 7 little feline girls and one little feline boy "Fall down 53 times. Get up 54." -- Zen saying
