I don't think its a matter of payback with this one, just selfishness. Same thing with H. When we first saw our counselor, he didn't want to say that he had started up with ow#2 during our reconciliation. He later admitted that it was just a matter of timing and selfishness. Just the same way that I can't understand why anyone would cheat, I'll never understand the men and women that allow themselves to become the affair partners.

C is well aware of H's issues with serial cheating. He is a sex therapist with oodles of experience under his belt. Not that he was able to gain a whole lot of information from our first visit, but I do believe that he would have went into a different direction if he didn't think that H was 'fixable' at least to some extent. However, the prognosis for serial cheaters is quite poor overall. Most people think that serial cheaters can change if they want to, but it usually includes them ending the relationships that they have cheated in.

I truly think that H had the misfortune of being surrounded by men that lack morals growing up. They made cheating into some kind of sport or rite of passage that they had to go through in order to be men. H is the most respectful, sensitive and considerate out of all of the men in his life. He has a lot of pressure to be this perfect person, and I guess instead of being hooked on drugs he chose another vice.

The fact is, anyone that has cheated - as in, had sexual or inappropriate contact with another person on more than one occasion is a serial cheater to me. Its the repetitive behavior that makes it 'serial.' Of course, I can't really compare my situation to those that only have had 1 ow or om during the course of their relationships. In the end, it hurts all the same.

I'm looking towards seeing the C in the next two weeks or so. Definitely before the holidays as we will be dealing with our families a lot more closely. H's mother is a huge source of stress. Way too much to even go into with her, but she is probably going to pass soon and I have to be sensitive to everyone's feelings.