Yes SIAS, it seems like she has new releases since the first one came out in the late 80's. I think she just revised it. Looks like she has a handbook too.
You are probably right Peter, by definition codependency is putting someone ahead of your own needs which can be healthy in a M if you know the boundaries. The difference with me is that I am doing this in unhealthy ways. I am not in any way suggesting that we should be selfish. I need to learn my own boundaries and hold myself to them. I'm sorry that the book was a negative thing in your R. I definitely think for my sitch, my H would be relieved. He has felt that I am controlling which is a symptom of codependency. By helping myself I am also helping those around me.
