too much time and distance

[any chance?]

Just had my first conversation with W in a couple of weeks, other than 2 minute exchanges at Thanksgiving.

Conversation is a bit hesitant and strained. Not sure she really wants to talk to me. She called to thank me for a care package I sent her this week. She tells me she is doing fine, but her demeanor suggests she either really, really does not want anything to do with me, or that she is not being truthful. I know, I know, I cannot read anything into anything.

Interesting to hear her say she has been prolonging the house remodel she has been working on because she is avoiding the next step, that being trying to find a job.

She also pointed out that she has not spent much time in her new city, due to travel to see friends and family. Seems as if she has not really had a chance to let her new sitch sink in.

She did make sure to mention ongoing D proceedings. Told her I had not heard from her L. She told me she would call them tomorrow.

And so it goes. Man, my friends, I am very tired of being depressed and all consumed. I am losing who I am very rapidly. Not good.